More anonymous comments on jeans with holes. (Updated)

 A couple more anonymous comments have been received about the jeans with holes in them. https://secret.viralsachxd.com/91c89b4db

It's unknown whether both are from a single commenter or if they came from different commenters.

If they are from the same commenter, then one comment basically explains the other. If not, then some clarification may be helpful about the second comment.

It's easy to understand the first one.

The second one is a little harder to understand, so hopefully the commenter can clarify their meaning a bit.

I think it means to give up on wearing the jeans due to the size of the hole, but just in case it means to give up on something else it would be better to be sure. Does it mean to give up wearing the jeans, or something like giving up trying to hide or cover the hole? Maybe the commenter can leave another anonymous comment that clarifies what should be given up on.

I don't want to misinterpret the intended meaning.

Giving up on wearing the jeans would mean reneging on a commitment for them to be worn until a negative comments is made about them by someone in public.

Giving up any attempt to conceal the hole or limit others view of it would be humiliating and possibly take some effort, at least during times I was aware of which jeans were being worn, and could possibly result in someone who knows me or someone I see on a regular basis seeing all that the hole enables them to see. Quite a few random others would also be enabled to see freely into the hole. 

It would also require an effort to be made to keep any erections from protruding through the hole. 

Even if I resisted or gave up on attempting to cover or conceal the hole, I could not just ignore an erection sticking right out through the hole in public. 

UPDATE: 4/21/2023

One additional anonymous comment received about the jeans with the holes in them.

With the comments being anonymous, it's impossible to to know if the comments are from one person or multiple people. 

Newest comment:

"Giving up" in that way is much easier said than done, since when I'm aware of my dick showing through the hole, it's almost instinctive to try to keep it covered or concealed. I may not always succeed at it, but it's hard not to at least try.

It's pretty inevitable that at some point trying to hide or conceal my exposure will fail, either due to me not realizing the extent of my exposure or failing to maintain coverage, or simply due to the hole growing too large for concealment to be possible. At that point all I can do is to relate what occurred, the reactions of others, and the extent of my humiliation.

Additional times being naked in front of or near window.

 A recent anonymous comment received at: https://secret.viralsachxd.com/91c89b4db mentioned how I'm in front of the window naked each time I get out of bed in the morning. 

Photos or video may not show it, but I can only get out of bed on the side of the bed closest to the window. A narrow area on the other side of the bed has a few boxes and other things stored there, so there is no way to stand up onto that side of the bed. 

When I'm about to get into bed, and each time I get out of bed, it's actually necessary for me to be in front of the window. Whether day or night, anyone looking at that time would be sure to see me. 

The glare of daylight can obscure the view of the outside in photos, but in reality that's not the case.

Nearly every time I dress or undress, it occurs in front of the window, simply because that's the most open and clutter free area available. If I'm wearing clothing before getting into bed for some reason, they are removed near the window. I climb into bed near the window before spending the night exposed through the window. 

The window sill is 30 inches (76.2 centimeters) above the floor, and the top of my bed is 36 inches (99.44 centimeters) above the floor, so my bed is 6 inches (15.24 centimeters) higher than the window sill. From outside, my entire mattress with me on it can easily be seen all night long.

If I do get out of bed during the night, it places me in front of the window naked, just as it does when I get out of bed in the morning. 

After spending another whole night exposed naked through the window, it feels futile for me to bother trying to limit any further exposure. The permanent requirement that I spend the entire night exposed naked prohibits any attempt at hiding or concealing anything, so over the six months it has been in effect I have gotten into the habit of not even trying to limit my exposure all night or in the morning. 

It's endlessly humiliating to have to remain exposed to anyone nearby all night and in the morning even after daylight, so it seems quite strange to me that I am in now in the habit of being exposed almost automatically, while all the while feeling the humiliation of it all. 

A good deal of the humiliation felt is probably due to knowing that my naked body is essentially public during these times, for anyone to see, and from knowing that I have been seen and will for sure continue to be seen naked by neighbors and any other random person who looks. I guess I get as much privacy as I deserve though.

Possibly publicly exposed wearing jeans with hole

 On a recent day, I had a few things to do which required going to multiple public locations. The list of things grew from just one to several things. Due to other issues occurring at the same time, I was a bit frustrated and exasperated. 

I had worn the jeans with the holes in them for a couple of days, and I had just laid out a different pair without holes that I intended to wear when I went out. I had laid those jeans near to where the ones with the holes had been placed. When I got dressed, probably due to my frustration at the time, I picked up the wrong jeans and put them on without even noticing. 

Since I thought I was wearing jeans without holes, I just grabbed a t-shirt that wasn't very long, since I didn't think a longer one was necessary. 

I still can't believe I never looked down or felt any air or breeze between my legs, but I went out confident that I had on a pair of jeans without any holes in them.

My first stop was a gas station, since my car was low on gas. I usually pay at the pump using a credit or debit card, but this time I was using cash, which meant walking up to a window where a cashier sat behind. Since several others were in line in front of me, I had to stand in line waiting for five to six minutes. Since I was sure I had a different pair of jeans on, I made no effort at all to pull down my shirt or to conceal anything. Once I pre-paid for fuel, I went back to the pump and fueled my car.

I then went to a bank, where I didn't have to wait in a line for too long. I was still sure I was wearing jeans without holes in them.

I then went to a grocery store where I didn't use a shopping cart, since I assumed I would easily be able to carry all of the items I was there to get. As I walked through the store gathering items from different aisles, I saw a few other items that I knew I needed but hadn't thought about until I saw them. I ended up with one arm held against my chest holding multiple items, and the hand on my other arm was also holding multiple items. 

I went to the checkout area and stood in line for a few minutes, still sure I was entirely covered between my legs. The cashier smiled and conversed a bit, but in hindsight I still have no idea if it may have anything to do with what I was wearing at the time.

When I got home, I still had other things to do at home, so I unloaded the groceries as quickly as possible. A couple neighbors were close by, but I didn't spend any time interacting with them.

Once at home I took care of most of what I still had to do before finally sitting down. Only then did I realize that I all along I had been wearing the jeans with the holes in them, and also wearing a shirt that was too short to have concealed or covered the larger hole in front.

When I did look down and saw my dick through the hole, I was stunned. I couldn't believe that I had been walking around with my dick almost certainly very visible without any idea about it at all. I'm still amazed that I'd been obliviously walking around with my dick visibly displayed. What's done is done though, and what's been seen has been seen.

Some photos from recently after my likely public exposure while wearing the same clothing that was worn in public, all except for shoes.

If anyone did see, and it seems impossible that no one saw, the hole is only going to get bigger until even my longest shirt won't be enough to conceal anything. I suppose I should be glad that I was a bit frustrated while out in public, which may be why I didn't get an erection this time. If I had gotten one, I would have been sure to notice which jeans I was wearing, but by then my erection would have been sticking out right there in public and there wouldn't have been much at all that I could have done to conceal it. 

Since no one said a word about the hole or my dick this time, I can only wonder when someone might say something, or if they'll mostly just look.  If nothing negative is said, then my dick may be seen by even more people and for a lot longer than I ever expected. Even just a slight glimpse of the hole lets it be known that I do not wear any underwear at all, which is bound to cause the hole to get attention. A closer look will surely show my once private part that is more and more becoming a public part.

Must report a rule violation for signature photos in emails

 For the purpose of openness and honesty, I must admit that I violated the rule for specific photos of me to be embedded in or attached to all emails I send or reply to. 

Three photos of me are always and in all circumstances to be included in any and all emails or replies sent out by me. The three photos are:

These photos were initially to be part of an email signature that would automatically be inserted into any composed email, but Yahoo began to no longer support photos in an email signature. This meant that the photos could only be included as attachments that needed to be manually added to each email.

I entirely neglected to do this in a recent email, and rightfully the recipient was aware of this failure and shortcoming by me, and also rightfully, they pointed this out to me. 

I admit that I was entirely wrong to have neglected a rule or requirement that always applies to me under all circumstances. I know these rules and requirements exist to be complied with and followed by me, and do not come with an option for me to neglect them. 

To be honest I am ashamed that I hadn't even realized that I neglected this rule, at least until I was caught and that my neglect was pointed out. In a way I'm grateful for having been caught and called out for it, so that this violation is not repeated. It shows me that I need to pay closer attention to what is required for me.

Just for informational purposes, I have two email accounts. One is with yahoo and my address is DaveS113065@yahoo.com

The other is with Google and my address is DaveS113065@gmail.com 

There are issues for me when sending a gmail to a yahoo address, likely due to the signature photos being embedded into the message, causing the message to be blocked from sending. But between the two email accounts, a message that includes the required photos is always so far able to be sent by me. 

I know that just because there are several other requirements that I'm obliged to follow, it's no excuse for neglecting to follow any one of them. There's never any excuse for me failing to do what's required of me. 

Sometimes the length of time between sending or replying to emails can be long for me, so it's not as ingrained in me like some other daily requirements are. I clearly need to pay more attention to following requirements that need to be followed less often. If not for the attentiveness of a recipient of a reply from me, and the fact that they were aware of the requirement and pointed out my failure to fulfill the requirement, my failure in compliance may have occurred again. 

I know I should never need to be informed of a failure to comply, or to be "caught", but in this case it's probably fortunate that I was caught quickly and that I was informed about it and expected to correct it. 

So I apologize to the recipient who had to call me out on a failure of mine, and in general to everyone else for failing to abide by a requirement. I promise to pay closer attention to this requirement in particular, and to ensure that one way or another, the three photos of me are included to every single email and reply that is sent out by me, no matter how redundant or repetitive it might be, and no matter who the recipient is.

 

Reply to comment about disintegrating clothes (jeans)

 An anonymous comment was recently received on the "Secret Message" page at: https://secret.viralsachxd.com/91c89b4db

Since replies to comments is not possible on the page, and the sender is entirely unknown, replying to it here on the blog is the best that can be done and maybe the sender will be able to read this reply.

The comment was:

 

 In reply to the first sentence, the sender and anyone else has every right to enjoy any situations or predicaments that are related to my exposure of humiliation in any way. Anything that occurs or happens where I am exposed or humiliated is certainly going to occur or happen anyway, so anyone who can or does enjoy any of it may as well take advantage of the opportunity.

So far it's just the one pair of jeans that is in the process of "disintegrating", with a small but growing hole at the top of the rear pocket, and a now quite large hole in front beside the zipper area. My other jeans and the shirts I wear with them are basically in decent shape. Even the jeans with the holes aren't all that worn out aside from the holes. 

But it's for sure that each time I wear the jeans with the holes in them out in public, I am more exposed in them than I was the time before, especially after they go through the washing machine and the dryer. In front of a mirror and without my shirt fully pulled down over the hole, I can quite easily see through the hole and see most of my dick. An erection makes it even more obvious, since it's usual position lines up almost exactly with the hole, and more often than not it will stick out of the hole.

It's anyone's guess how long it might be before somebody says something, since some of that depends on who ends up noticing or seeing some or all of my dick through the hole at some point. I do my best to keep the hole covered by the bottom of my shirt in public places, so as long as I'm successful at that, there's less chance for someone to see something and then say something about it. It's more or less inevitable that I won't successfully conceal things enough, either because of being unable to keep my shirt pulled down far enough, or because the hole simply gets too large. That's the likely point where someone will see into the hole and see my dick.

Even when someone does see my dick, that still may not be the point when something is said about it. They may or may not decide to say something to me about it. If they don't say anything, then that means someone else will also eventually see into the hole and see my dick. Things will repeat like that until someone finally does say something. If what they say is derogatory or negative, then the jeans can stop being worn.  

Until that point the jeans will continue to become more rag-like while being worn in public. Since no underwear can be worn underneath, every stitch and shred of fabric the jeans lose further reveals and exposes me.

At times while in public, I can often feel the breeze or the wind blowing across my dick, and it's difficult to know for sure whether it's just blowing into the hole or if my dick is actually outside of the hole. Since in public it's not always possible to be adjusting and shifting things around "down there", or to be able to just lift my shirt and look to see, I usually just end up trying to keep the bottom of my shirt pulled down as far as possible. How well that works depends on how long the shirt is that I'm wearing, and how far it might be able to be stretched downwards. As it is, if I ever end up having to reach up high with both hands while in public or within view of others, then no shirt I have would be long enough to prevent my exposure and almost certain humiliation. 

At the time of this writing, the jeans with the hole in are in the process of being washed and dried once again, so within days they will be due to be worn again, and the holes are sure to have been made larger. During the few days while they're being worn again, it won't be possible to avoid ending up in public at least a couple of times.  

                      As an erection begins to occur, it can easily slip out through the hole.
 

 

Once an erection becomes full, it can no longer just be slid back into the hole, and has to be left out until it subsides or until there is enough privacy to unbutton and unzip the jeans.

 

 

100 days of no masturbation or cumming

April 11th of 2023 marks the 100th day since being prohibited from masturbating or cumming intentionally. On average I would have masturbated and came about 400 times during this period. 

So instead of masturbating, cumming, and then going back to non sexual and non arousing things and thoughts, I have for the most part remained aroused, turned on, and often thinking sexual or kinky thoughts when none of that would otherwise be occurring.

The poll for deciding about my masturbation can still be voted in, and will remain available until February 1st of 2024, when the decision with the majority of votes at that time will become permanent for me. Clicking the results button at the bottom of the poll page will show the current results whether voting is performed or not.

https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K

Just as they have so far, the majority decision must be and will be respected and obeyed by me at all times. Only others are qualified to decide what it is that I deserve in this matter. 

Of course one result on not masturbating, shown in the photo below, is an extremely common occurrence for me, at any time or place and often seemingly without a reason or direct cause.

 

The requirement that I remain exposed naked all night, every night means there's no hiding or concealing any erection I get, and that others are either likely or sure to see me with one. 

Also, as I continue to wear a pair of jeans with a hole beside the zipper (without underwear since none can ever be worn by me), and as the size of the hole continues to enlarge, my dick continues be become more visible and easier for others to see. Ongoing spontaneous erections will not only continue to pop out through the hole, but will surely pop out more often as the hole becomes larger. 

Wearing a long shirt and having it pulled down is already the only real means for keeping my dick from being openly exposed in public settings. Common erections due to not masturbating are nearly impossible to entirely conceal, especially once my erection extends fully out through the hole.  

                    My dick is often just inside the hole and on the verge of popping out

 

Once an erection begins to occur, my dick tends to come out through the hole. Getting it back inside of the hole is not always easy or possible if others are nearby.

 

Once I have a full erection in any public place or around others, it's not really possible to force my dick back into the hole without also only revealing my dick while doing it, or without trying to forcefully bend it. If not privacy is available to undo my pants, then my erection must remain outside of the hole until it subsides or until there is an opportunity to undo my pants. At best an attempt to pull down my shirt to cover it is the only available option while trying not to allow the bulge under my pulled down shirt. 

One second of loosing the grip on my shirt can lead to my erection being fully revealed and visible, such as having to used both hands for other tasks, or of course if someone else intentionally pulled up my shirt. 

Many of my shirts are just not long enough to offer much cover, even while being pulled downwards. Only one is actually long enough to not need to be overly stretched to cover my dick while also concealing a bulge underneath. 

Each time an erection occurs in public while wearing those jeans, I can only wonder if attempts to conceal it will be successful, or if this is a time when my erection will end up being openly exposed.

Overall Exposure update

Part one: Nightly Exposure Naked: 

At times days can pass without anything too noteworthy occurring in relation to my exposure, at least as far as I know. 

That's especially the case for the requirement that I sleep and spend every night exposed naked through a window. Some nights, especially when I'm very tired, I go to bed and fall asleep quickly, and I only wake up when the alarm goes off in the morning. Currently that time is 7:30AM and it's already daylight out. although at other times I have to wake up a bit earlier.

Of course by sleeping straight through the night, I would have no way of knowing about being seen or observed in bed naked whether it was by one or even ten people. On those nights I just know that I went to be naked and exposed, and then I woke up naked and exposed.

I do know that from about 6:30 AM onward, that several nearby others who would have a direct view of my bed through the window begin to come outside and/or go to their vehicles to go wherever they need to go. Others come out to walk or to walk their dogs at about that same time or just after. On mornings when I've been awake at those times, I've noticed these things, so I assume they occur the same way at the same time each day whether I am awake or not. 

So on nights when I sleep straight through until the alarm goes off, it's easily possible that I am being looked at naked by one or more of those nearby people but it's just that I'm oblivious to it. 

Since the nights and the early mornings have been warmer recently, it's been possible for the window sash to remain open all night to have fresh air all night. This has always been done except for when the nights get too cool for part of the year. 

It doesn't make much of a difference for how visible I might be whether the sash is up or not while in bed naked, but it seems possible that it might make me easier to notice somehow.

I only consider this due to having awakened at around 6:45AM on a recent morning. I recall waking up in the usual way, where at first I'm only aware that I'm in bed. I'm not immediately conscious of the fact that I'm completely naked, uncovered, brightly lit up with lights, and fully exposed through the window. These facts usually sink in slowly as I wake up further. What I was aware of though, was the fact that I was lying on my back and that I had a full erection that was pointing up towards my belly button. 

I don't know what to call it, but several times I did the thing that can make an erection move or bounce without touching it, like a kind of drawing in with some muscles or some ability that only happens with an erection. I was enjoying the feeling of doing that and feeling my erection lift up and then fall back against my stomach.

While I was doing this, I continued to wake up further, and I became aware that I was exposed naked. Still, I didn't really give it a lot of thought, since that happens every morning as part of waking up. I still hadn't opened my eyes, and I just kept enjoying making my erection move up and down without touching it. I especially enjoy doing that since I cannot masturbate and I am pretty aroused every morning when I wake up. 

After a bit of lying there making my erection move, I did happen to open my eyes to see that it was still fairly dark outside, but that it had begun to get light outside enough for me to be able to see some detail outside. Also, with the sash open, there isn't the glare from the inside lights reflecting off of the window glass, and my own naked reflection is not being reflected back to me.

I noticed that the lights of a vehicle were on of someone who lives nearby. Usually they pull away quickly after they get into their vehicle, but this time they just sat there. I laid there, still with an erection that wasn't about to go away, and waited. I knew there was nothing I could do except to wait. I knew if they were looking at me then getting up and out of bed would expose me even more, since I can only get out of bed on the side that places me directly in front of the window naked. 

I waited, and still they just sat in their vehicle with the lights on for minute after minute. If they were looking at me, I knew they had an excellent view of me, and I couldn't think of any other reason why they were just sitting there. I could only assume they had already seen my erection bouncing up and down and that they were either waiting to see it happen more, or were just looking at me lying there completely naked with an erection. 

I finally closed my eyes so I wouldn't see that I was probably being looked at naked, but after a minute or two I wanted to know if they had driven away yet. I finally just peeked a little again and I couldn't believe that they were still sitting there. It was just a bit lighter outside by them and it was enough for me to notice that two people were standing not far beyond the vehicle who also appeared to be standing side by side looking directly at me.

Now I didn't dare move, since I didn't want to give away the fact that I was awake, but to say I felt extremely exposed is an understatement. I moaned a little bit, knowing that I must be being looked at naked and I couldn't do anything except to let them look. I thought that if I did move at all, they would be aware that I knew they were seeing me.

 I willed my erection to go down, but it was as if it wanted to be noticed and seen, since it stayed as hard as it had been. For the next couple of minutes my requirement to be exposed resulted in my naked body most likely resulted in my naked body being viewed publicly right from my bed.

The two standing observers finally left first, and the vehicle drove off less than a minute later. I tried to convince myself that it was all a coincidence, and that none of those people had really been looking at me naked, but I knew that wasn't true. I knew they had probably been aware of my nightly naked exposure, had probably observed me before, and were probably looking at me for entertainment. It can't be ruled out that they may even have photos of me naked in bed that were taken at some point. They also know that I am there to be seen naked every night and morning. 

That next night as I got into bed naked, I just knew that before I got out of bed the next morning, that I was going to be seen and looked at naked for sure. 

That night I was very tired from an extra long and difficult day of work, and as much as I tried to stay up until my usual bedtime of 11:00 PM or so, I couldn't stay awake. I ended up getting into bed just after 10:00 PM. I knew that meant more people would still be out and about who might see me naked, but aside from being so tired, I knew that being seen naked was inevitable and I just resigned myself to it. Since I fell asleep quickly, I don't know how much my exposure may have been observed early in the night.

I did wake up at one point without knowing what time it was, although it was still dark outside. I was lying on my side with me bare butt facing the window, and my butt was basically arched outwards. My face was pointed away from the window. As usual it took me a moment to recall that I was currently exposed naked. Once I remembered this I did wonder if anyone might be looking at me, but I knew there was no point in thinking about it. I didn't even bother to move. I was able to fall asleep again right away.

When I woke up again it was daylight, but just a little before the alarm was due to go off. I was lying on my back trying to wake up the rest of the way and waiting to see if my erection would go down when I noticed someone standing outside a short distance away from my window. I saw that it was someone who lived very close to me. This person can see me in bed right from their window and patio door, but mostly only from my waist up. I knew they could see me fully from parts of their yard, but I was never sure they had seen me enough to know that I was naked. This time they had walked to a spot that wasn't on their property, but where they could see me fully through the window. They stood there looking right towards me for a nearly two minutes without looking away once. I knew for sure they were looking at me naked, and it was one of the most obvious times I've been looked at so far, at least where I was aware of it. 

I can only wonder whether I have been looked at like that all along and people are just getting bolder or less inhibited at looking at me. It's possible that I just never noticed it or saw it happen before because I was either asleep or not paying attention to anything outside. Since I'm exposed naked every night and until morning, some people clearly know they can see me, and after so long they may just not care how obvious it is that they are looking at me. It's doubtful they are aware of the requirement for me to be exposed naked, or that I can't cover up or hide anything, but it's almost as if they know all of that. 

I always know that getting into bed naked is so that I am exposed, but it now seems that it also means being seen, looked at, or watched naked on a regular basis. 

While the poll with this requirement was still open, and once decision that I be required to sleep naked and exposed every night had a large majority of votes, a few people online mentioned that I had to be exposed but also seen, I didn't envision being seen or watched  the way that's happening now. I figured I might receive a few glances at most and maybe eventually someone might take a longer look. Now some people seem to be going out of their way just to look at me naked in bed. 

Just knowing people can see me naked already made me feel exposed, but now knowing that people will see me naked has greatly increased that feeling of exposure. Especially since I know it doesn't change anything. I still have to sleep exposed naked even though it means being seen for sure, and over and over again. The poll results made it clear that I deserve this, so once again I just have to accept what I deserve. 

Anyone using the Teamviewer or Anydesk remote access apps can view me naked in bed by accessing my PC between 11:00 PM and 7:30 AM Eastern Time, either to verify that I am being exposed through the window naked while uncovered  and with lights on, or just because they want to. The camera is always set up to show me naked while in bed all night long, every night.

 Teamviewer address: 1 054 262 400 Password: Nakedandexposed1

Anydesk address: 990 573 524 Password: Showmystuff1

Photos or video can be taken with the camera, and transferred using that option on either app. Any photos or video taken will be sent to the "Camera Roll" folder. An shortcut icon can be found on my desktop directly above the light blue camera icon at the bottom of the screen. 

An icon for the Cam4 website can be found directly beside the camera icon. This icon will enable me to be broadcast naked in bed on the Cam4 site without me being aware of it, but after a few minutes of inactivity on the site, a box will appear that needs to be clicked on to prevent the broadcast from ending. 

This is why I am not broadcast naked every night, all night, since once in bed the box cannot be clicked on. But as long as the box is repeatedly clicked on every few minutes, any broadcast would continue. Of course both the broadcast and the webcam cannot be active at the same time. It has to be either one or the other, although any viewer could still see me as I was broadcast naked. 

Part Two: A Hole in Jeans.

Just an update and some clarification on wearing a pair of jeans with a (now) large hole near the zipper.

I currently have three pairs of blue jeans, all having been bought at the same time. One of them seems weaker than the others, since a hole developed just to the left of the zipper in front. None of the other jeans have any holes in them yet. This one pair not only has a hole next to the zipper, but there is also a hole above the left rear pocket, on the side closest to the center seam going over the butt area. This hole is still only large enough to fit a thumb through, but since I don't wear underwear, it does make a small part of my bare butt cheek visible. Since the large hole in front tends to be the one I try to stay aware of most of the time, I almost always forget about the rear hole. Anyone seeing it would immediately know that I had no underwear on, and they would know they were seeing a small area of my butt cheek, but I tend to focus on keeping my dick from flopping out or popping out of the in the front. When soft, my dick can now flop out of the hole quite easily. When hard, my dick can actually pop out through the hole, especially when I'm getting an erection and my dick is getting hard. It can pop out while my dick is only partly erect, and unless I get it back into the hole right away before my erection is full, it can be very difficult to get it to go back into the hole, since quite a bit of my erection will extend above the hole. 

If I crouch down, lean forward, and use my hands, I can get an erection back into the hole. I can also unbutton and unzip my pants and shove my erection back into the hole. But if I'm out in public anywhere, I can't really do those things. I can sometimes get my soft dick back inside of the hole without it being too obvious, but I can't really get an erection to go back inside the same way. In that case about all I can do is leave my erection sticking out and try to cover it with by pulling down the bottom of my shirt as bast as I can. I also have to keep my shirt bottom slightly away from my body, or else the outline and the bulge of my erection will show. 

Since I'm currently prohibited from masturbating, I'm much more likely to get erections that last for a while and that come at times that might be inconvenient or even humiliating. The jeans with the hole would be retired but I've committed to continue to wear them until someone sees enough of something that they make some sort of negative comment about them. 

I normally wear any one pair of jeans for three to four days, depending on whether they get dirty or have something spilled on them. I wear work jeans all day, so I only wear my personal jeans in the evening after a shower, and on days off from work. So the jeans with the hole(s) in them tend to be worn for three of four days out of every ten or so days, or about three times per month for a total of about nine or ten days. 

Here are some recent photos of me wearing the jeans with the hole in front showing:

I know that by keeping my dick covered with my shirt in public, I'm just ensuring that I have to keep wearing the jeans for longer, and until the hole gets even bigger, but it's difficult to just let my dick willingly stick out and be seen publicly. So I'll continue to try to keep it covered for as long as I can.

It's basically inevitable that my dick will be seen in public at some point. I don't think it has been seen yet, but I can't be sure. No one has said anything one way or another yet though. But even if my dick is seen and no comment is made or no negative comment is made, it means my dick still has to be seen again. So one way or another my dick is going to be seen in public at least once. I just have no idea who will see it or where it will occur. 

Add-On:

After this post was published, a couple of photos were taken of the hole in the jeans by the rear pocket. The hole is still quite small, but is always more visible to others since there is no attempt to cover it up. It can instantly reveal that I have no underwear on, and it is less often covered by any shirt I'm wearing.

No masturbating - update

 In the last couple of days, seven more votes were received in the poll, and all seven chose that I cannot masturbate or intentionally cum. The poll will still be open for many months yet, but the current results seem to indicate that I may not actually deserve to masturbate or cum intentionally. Since the current result in the majority must be obeyed, it's clear that I definitely won't be masturbating or cumming any time soon. I will be remaining aroused, horny, and turned on, which I have to accept as what I deserve. 

https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K 

Aside from learning what I actually deserve, not masturbating is revealing some unexpected things to me. 

The most unexpected of all is that being aroused and turned on from not masturbating kind of turns around on itself for me. By that I mean that because I am most often aroused and horny, and I know that I cannot masturbate or cum, knowing I have to stay that way arouses and turns me on even more. So basically, being aroused and turned on from not being allowed to masturbate makes me even more aroused and turned on. It took a while of not masturbating before that seemed to begin, but I may just have taken a while to realize it. I have been prohibited from masturbating for more than 90 days so far, so I don't know if knowing I can't masturbate or cum will continue to keep making me even more aroused and turned on. I suppose it's just another part of what I deserve though.

Another thing I've discovered is that I cannot resist edging myself repeatedly and often, even though I know it can never result in me cumming or ejaculating. I don't technically masturbate, since I don't actually stroke or use a hand. Being so aroused all I have to do is to keep lightly touching my dick with a fingertip on the under side just below the head, and it's enough to keep be edged. I have to pause every so often to ensure that I don't get too close to cumming, which is an endless tease for me, but I know I have to obey the requirement for not cumming at all. 

I don't really want to do it and keep teasing myself, but if I'm alone and preoccupied with something else, I often realize I am already doing it. Once I realize it, it's very hard to stop doing it. Usually something will interrupt me and I will stop then, or I get so aroused that I can barely do it at all without a risk of cumming, and my only option is to force myself to stop doing it. Occasionally I stop because I have someplace to go, which usually means I'm heading out being super aroused and with an erection. Most of the time when walking out the door I'm aroused with an erection. 

Something I found to be very true is that I do not dare to risk intentionally cumming no matter how possible it might appear that there's a chance for getting away with it. Knowing I'm not allowed to intentionally cum and knowing it would violate a requirement is more than enough to ensure that I obey the requirement. I would know I was guilty of violating the requirement, and of disobeying decisions others have made, and I would be stuck living with that guilt. I also feel absolutely sure that my offense would be known about or discovered, and I would have no justification for it. What most voters decide that I deserve is certain to be what I deserve, and that decision must be accepted by me and obeyed by me. Accepting what I deserve is the only option for me. 

With the requirement that I have to sleep naked every night, without any covering, with sufficiently bright lights on, and with the window uncovered that enables a direct view of me from outside, not be permitted to masturbate is continuously causing erections and leading me to hump the bed, mostly during sleep, but now also when awake but near to falling asleep. I tried to limit or even prevent these things from occurring, since they can and likely will be seen by others with a view of my window, but I've had to resign myself to the fact that those things are going to occur due to me being so aroused and horny. Because they are going to occur, I just have to accept the fact that others are going to see those things when they are seeing me naked in bed. Some have more than likely already seen me with an erection in bed or seen me humping the bed naked or both, which can't be unseen even if I could somehow limit or prevent those things from occurring. 

Each night, I go to bed only knowing that I will be exposed naked through the window all night long, but most nights, or for all I know every night, I end up providing much more of a display for anyone who sees me through the window due to being so aroused from not masturbating or cumming. It's clear by now that this is going to continue indefinitely if not always, so maybe eventually everyone who can see it will see it, and there will hardly be anyone left who hasn't seen all of it. That seems about the only real option for me, since I'm required not to hide, cover, or conceal anything during the night or while in bed.

I suppose getting what I deserve can't be expected to be easy all of the time, but I know it does have to be accepted as much as possible even when it's occurring.

Note: The poll https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K has three options or choices ever since it had to be moved to a different polling site, since it was mentioned twice that the poll options were to complex and complicated, and that the poll needed to be simplified to options that either allowed me to masturbate or for me to not be allowed to masturbate. The earlier options were said to be redundant. They also received basically no votes, so their removal didn't effect the overall results.

Two options still allow for the option for me to masturbate in some way, while one does not. So in the end I will either have some sort of permission to masturbate and cum, or I will be permanently prohibited from masturbating and intentionally cumming, and I will have to accept that I only deserve to be aroused and turned on. But that's for voters to decide and I am and will be required to obey their decision.

Potential for a webcam broadcast of my nightly exposure naked -updated

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A hole in jeans update

 A couple months ago I related in a post about having a pair of blue jeans that had developed a small hole next to the zipper area. At the time a comment on the post suggested that I keep wearing them for as long as possible. Since "as long as possible" isn't very defining, it was decided that I would continue to wear them until a negative comment is made by someone about them to me personally while I am wearing them.

I currently have three pairs of jeans that I cycle through, wearing one after another. Each pair is worn, washed, and dried in a clothes dryer about once per week. Since the last post about them, the pair with the hole has been repeatedly worn just as I committed to doing. They have been washed and dried since then between eight and ten times. Here is what the hole currently looks like:

The hole continues to grow larger after each washing and drying, and my dick tends to pop out of the hole at times. Especially when I first stand up or while walking. It doesn't pop out every single time I get and erection, but if the hole is lined up in a certain way while an erection is growing, the tip of my dick will pop out of the hole. 

If no one is nearby, and I can push my dick back into my pants, only part of my shaft would show through the hole. But if I can't shove my dick back into my pants and my erection becomes full, it's very difficult to just shove it back inside without undoing my pants because of how much of my dick is extended beyond the hole. If I'm lucky, my erection will subside quickly and allow me to push my dick back into the hole. If I'm not lucky and others are around me, all I can do is to try to keep my shirt pulled down enough to cover my erection while it's extending through the hole.

The week before the photos were taken I was in a large drug store when one of my now common spontaneous erections began to occur. At first I didn't think much of it even though there were people throughout the store. Then I felt the tip of my dick begin exiting the hole. I was in an aisle where there were people in front of me and also behind me, and I didn't know what to do. I stopped walking and pretended to be looking at something on a lower shelf as I attempted to get my erection back inside of the hole while keeping my shirt pulled down as far as it would go. Since I was carrying items I had to set them down to free my hands. I could only use one hand since the other hand had to keep my shirt pulled down far enough. By then my erection had grown too much and too much of it extended out of the hole for me to get it to go back inside of the hole. I nearly succeeded but my pants were too tight for there to be enough slack in them, and my dick was too stiff. As others began walking in my direction I had to abandon my attempts and reign myself to just tying to keep my shirt pulled down. I had to pull down hard and stretch my shirt out, which was surely noticeable, but if I didn't my erection would be right out in the open.

I also had to keep the bottom of my shirt slightly away from my body, or the bulge and outline of my erection would easily show under my shirt. I couldn't carry the items I'd selected and keep my shirt pulled down at the same time, so I had to go and get a small basket the store keeps available and carry the basket with one hand while keeping my shirt pulled down. 

Fortunately for me, the checkout counter is high enough that by standing up against it, I was able to let go of my shirt without it rising up. As far as I know I managed to exit the store without anyone seeing my erection directly, even though one or more people may have noticed either the bulge under my shirt or the fact that I was making an effort to stretch the bottom of my shirt down as far as it would go.

I have dozens of t-shirts that I regularly wear, and of all of them only one will hang down far enough to cover the hole in my jeans or the fact that my dick is sticking out of it or at least visible through the hole. When that shirt is in the laundry, only shorter shirts are available. 

When I first put on the jeans with the hole, I am aware of the hole. But I very often forget that it's those jeans that I'm wearing when I go out anywhere. Unless something draws my attention to the hole, such as feeling my dick pop out through the hole, I often fail to think about the hole at all. On cool days I might feel the cool air hitting my dick and be reminded of the hole, but on warmer days as it's been lately where I live, I often go in and out of places and do whatever I'm out to do all without acknowledging the hole. Only later when I once again realize I have those jeans on, do I realize that I was walking around oblivious to the hole being there. I don't recall anyone obviously noticing the hole or seeing my dick through the hole, but if I'm not conscious of the hole at any moment, I'm not watching out for that sort of thing.

At times while wearing those jeans I will happen to look down and see my soft dick right inside of the hole, and if it won't be too noticeable to anyone I will quickly shit my dick to the right side, since the hole is on my left side. That only works for a short time or until I move around, since my dick naturally moves to the left side and will stay there. On it's own my dick will settle right where the hole is, which may have something to do with how the hole began to form in that spot to begin with. 

At the moment the hole is big enough to enable my dick to just pop through it at any time, but otherwise the jeans are still in decent enough shape for them to continue to be worn. More than once lately, when I need to pee and I'm about to unzip my pants while standing on front of a toilet, I will notice that my dick is already partially sticking out of the hole, and I will just pull it out through the hole a bit more and then pee without having to unzip the zipper at all. 

The next few cycles through the laundry are sure to enlarge the hole even more, and it's inevitable that others will notice it or possibly see my dick. If someone sees it and says something negative about it, then the jeans can be retired. If they see and don't say anything then nothing changes and the jeans will be worn again. 

If I could wear some sort of underwear, the jeans might be able to be worn indefinitely, but I long ago promised and committed not to ever wear underwear for any reason at all. It's also been so long since I've worn any that the feeling of them is intolerable to me. I only possess one single pair of underwear that were originally kept for unique times like doctors exams or such things, but underwear has not been worn even for those reasons for a long time. If I'm told at an exam to strip to my underwear, I just have to inform them that I don't wear any and have none on. So wearing underwear is not an option for me.

For now the jeans with the hole will continue to be worn regularly along with the other pairs that I own. It's inevitable that my dick will pop out from time to time, and I will deal with it as best as I can. For them not to be worn anymore, someone will not only end up seeing my dick, but they will also have to make a negative comment or react about it in a less than positive manner. Until that happens the hole will become larger and larger and will expose me even more than it already does.