More online exposure from unexpected source.

 A few days ago I received and email from an unrecognized email address. At first I assumed that it would be an email that had to be replied to, and that someone would soon be receiving the three signature images of me naked that are part of everything sent by me from that address. 

But the email seemed to be some group or organization, which made me think that I might not be exposed again because of it.

When i curiously opened the email, all I saw was this:

I recently found and watched a video of you at: https://clipchamp.com/watch/7lDRE2DQzKS I'm sure you deserved it and that you deserve for it to be watched very publicly, but what must be on your mind from knowing people you know are seeing it.   

The sender was listed as:

<anonymous@sendity.org>

 Once I realized it was an email sent anonymously, I knew I wouldn't need to reply to it, since I couldn't. But I saw the link in the message and knew right away that it just had to go to a video of me naked. I clicked the link to see which video it might be. 

The moment the page loaded I saw that the video was the one of me that's currently being featured on Facebook, where a lit cigarette is in my asshole and I'm tied and have to wait for it to burn down and punish my asshole. 

At first this made me anxious, since it was proof that someone had watched that video, and had sent the link to it to me. But I quickly realized that the video was there for anyone to watch and that it was only one more person who had now seen it. So I didn't think too much more about it afterwards.

But the very next day I saw that another email had been received from the same place. This one went even further by including the link to the same video, but also including a working link to the Dropbox full of photos and videos of me naked. 

I recently mentioned finding and watching a video of you at: https://clipchamp.com/watch/7lDRE2DQzKS I just came across your Dropbox where a lot of pics and videos of you can be seen and downloaded. https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fo/2yzbofrn4k2pdju7ncot5/h?rlkey=45zgt41wvnlrmoeoc7ft0a8sq&fbclid=IwAR0NWYvNjwTB-JBAxJTLTCQPvhx3DAnJZ4sWCpIG2-FI8z-OW9lBukXBapo&dl=0 As I said before, I'm sure you deserved what the video shows of you and that you deserve for it to be watched very publicly. Especially by people who know you. Since your Dropbox link is public and anyone can have pics and videos of you, maybe more people you know and people everywhere should see the pics and videos of you, and be able to download them for any use they might have for them. It's probably best for this email to be accessible to others, and it will be. You just won't know where that is or be able to change it. You're welcome for that.  

This email was sent anonymously using Sendity.
Please do not reply to this email, Your reply I will go nowhere

My attention was on the links in the message and not so much on the text of it, and I wondered what the point was for sending me links to my own exposure. 

But then I noticed that some of the text mentioned the email being accessible to others and how it would be. I felt some anxiety rising as I wondered what that meant. I didn't see any other recipients listed. I wondered if separate emails might have been sent to other people. 

When I tried visiting the site where the emails came from all I saw was a page for sending an email anonymously. I pondered it all for a while, but then I decided it wasn't worth trying to figure out since there was nothing I could do about it anyway.

For two more days everything seemed to be over with, with no more emails like that coming.

But then another email appeared in my inbox from the same location. This one was both more stunning and more confusing, since it contained my name, me email address in the actual message, a list of links to videos of me naked, and it even mentioned how three photos of me naked have to be in every email I send or reply to. I knew whoever it was had to be someone pretty familiar with me and with my online exposure naked. 

 

To: DaveS113065@gmail.com (David Steckel) Your online presence seems to be endless. So much that more of you keeps showing up. Just in the last day, these were came across. 

 https://clipchamp.com/watch/NFu3iNYGkHM 

  https://clipchamp.com/watch/giDZnaBrTXU 

 https://clipchamp.com/watch/2xwNOfJ6OZn 

 https://clipchamp.com/watch/LBl6TVZlcLI 

 https://clipchamp.com/watch/kaFLFQfdnAH?utm_source=share&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=watch 

 https://clipchamp.com/watch/9j7X0pU8YMw 

 And then there's this: "Without exception, all emails and replies sent from Daves113065@gmail.com must include the three signature images of David Steckel." Three very revealing images of you of course. There must be times when you dread that obligation. When you don't know who will be seeing you or when you really don't want someone to see you. But rules are rules which can't be changed due to feelings.

This email was sent anonymously using Sendity.
Please do not reply to this email, Your reply I will go nowhere

 

That was the stunning part. The confusing part is that it seemed like a lot of trouble to send all of that to me, since I would be the only one who could see it.

I was perplexed enough to go back to the website and to look at it a little better.

I still couldn't find anything that explained much. Then I noticed a few lines in a small box on the top right side of the page. When I clicked on it, a drop-down menu opened. As I read the options in it, my eyes focused on a line that said "Anonymous Wall". 

Assuming it was something that was only accessible to some sort of paid membership, I clicked on it without expecting to be able to access it. 

But a long page opened up with all kinds of random email messages that appeared to be sent to people anonymously. They were arranged by date and got older as the page was scrolled down. I clicked on one message and it opened up to show the whole message. It seemed like gibberish, so I closed it which returned me to the list page.

It began to occur to me that the emails sent to me might also be on the page somewhere, and as I started to scroll down to see if that was true, I know that I said out loud "No. It couldn't be. It can't be..."

But it was. Only a short scroll down and there was the last message to me. A further scroll down showed the other messages to me. 

Now I knew what was meant by "accessible to others". The emails came from someone who was anonymous, but what they contained was available to anyone who scrolled down that page. With videos of me, a Dropbox, and my full name and email address all being so available, and where it's anyone's guess at how many other people might see it all, I assumed there must be a way to hide or remove those messages. 

But there appears not to be any method or means for removing anything. As I sat back and realized there was not a single thing I could do about it, I couldn't ignore the fact that by the time I found that page, that some people had probably already seen the emails to me.

Then I thought "Maybe they won't last long there. Maybe the moderation for the site will remove them". 

But not so far. Their policy seems to be that only threats of violence get removed.  The site appears to be content just to leave the messages in place where users or visitors to the site are able to see them. I can only assume the sender of the emails knew that or wanted that. 

I am curious about who sent and posted the messages, but then I think about how I probably don't have a right to know that. 

But since the emails can be seen by anyone on that site, there's no point in it being withheld from anyone else.

The list page or wall page can be found at:

https://sendity.org/wall/ 

The three emails I received can be found at: (in the order they were received)

https://sendity.org/a-video-of-you/ 

https://sendity.org/re-a-video-of-you/

https://sendity.org/more-of-you/ 

For me there's not much to do except to wait and be seen with everyone being able to know my name and my email address. 

Some of the other emails I saw on the wall page seem to be from some not so nice or not so pleasant or polite people, so I don't know what I might expect once they click any of the links and end up seeing me naked. I'm a little, but not too concerned about that though. All I really expect to happen now is that more people will be seeing me naked, and will see me in some videos.

What I think about most is how, even if it was necessary, there really is nothing I can do about it, since rules for things like voyeurism and privacy rights do not apply to me. The sender must be aware of having the right to expose me as they wish. 

I suppose they do deserve some credit for their resourcefulness. 

They found and used a website that I'd never heard of before. 

They sent messages that I thought only I could see, but all along were visible to other people. 

They knew where to find things that showed me naked, and they basically made sure other people would see those things. 

They had to know that once the messages were sent to me, they would end up on a page where anyone could see them, and where I would have to leave them even if I found the page. 

So for now I'm just waiting as people using the site see me, and waiting to see if anything more than that results from it that would be known to me. 

I already realize that I will never know how many people will have seen me naked because of it all. There's always the contrast of how the ability to see me naked is so public, and how everyone who sees me naked can always see me anonymously and privately.

 

Video for December 2023 available to Facebook friends and more.

 The video for December of 2023 that is now available for viewing by Facebook friends and by others happens to be one that would preferably have remained obscure and mostly unseen. But its absence from public view has not gone unnoticed by at least some people. Because it's a public video just as all of the others of me naked are public videos, when asked about its absence for viewing by Facebook friends, the answer would be that it is coming soon. 

Even when that was said, I knew that I did not want others to see the video, and especially not for it to be seen by people who know me. But if it was not available, then it meant that what was said was untrue, and also that a public video was being kept from or concealed from those with the right to see it.

The video can be seen at: https://clipchamp.com/watch/7lDRE2DQzKS

The posts on Facebook can be seen by Facebook members on the pages 

https://www.facebook.com/david.steckel.75  

and 

https://www.facebook.com/DavidSteckelNewd

The video shows me completely naked and helplessly tied to a bed in a bent over position. My wrists are tied separately to the rail below the far side of the bed and my legs are tied in a spread apart position. My bare ass and my balls are clearly visible, and my asshole is at least partly visible. But the worst part is that the filter end of a lit cigarette is stuck in my asshole, which has already burned much of the way down as the video begins.

The title of the video is "David Steckel endures a hot-butt punishment" and I'm seen becoming more and more desperate as this "punishment" begins to occur. 

The preference for the video to not be seen publicly is not due to me being seen naked and exposed in it, since I will always be seen naked publicly anyway. I think it's due more to the fact that the video shows my asshole being "punished" and because I'm totally restrained, all I can do is wait there being watched as it starts to happen and during the whole time it's happening. In spite of what some of the text in the video says, it never left my mind entirely that people were going to be seeing everything. They would see me tied up and stuck bent over naked and with a lit cigarette stuck in my asshole. They would see me have to leave the lit cigarette there because there was no way for me to reach it or to remove it. They would see how my asshole held the cigarette there so that the ember would reach my asshole and then even stay in contact with my asshole for as long as it existed. 

Once the ember was very close to my asshole, they would see me start to squirm as it was felt. Once the ember reached my asshole, they would see me squirming, kicking my legs and feet, and fidgeting as much as my restraints would allow. They might even also be able to hear me whining and moaning as I endured what was going on in my asshole behind me. At the time I felt pretty sure that I had taken it rather stoically and that I had not really made any sounds. When I did see the video later, I found out that I could be heard whimpering even though I had not realized I had been doing it.

I had not wanted to put on any sort of show, and I tried not to show any reaction, but the point came when I just could not help it. I think even at the time my main thought over everything else was that it would be humiliating when everyone saw me like that. I knew that by the time the restraints were removed, the video might already be public somewhere on the internet. I knew that the point was for it to end up online in places where I had no way to remove it even if I tried, and in places and in front of people that I did not know about. 

For about a month afterwards I was told that the video had been posted on at least a dozen websites, but the two others who said they made the posts would not tell me what the sites were or how to fund them. I was basically told that it was so that a lot of other people would see the video before I even knew where it was posted or how much it was being viewed. 

Once one posting of the video was said to have reached five thousand views I was told how to find it. When I tried to find it though, I found out that to see it I would have to join the site and pay a large membership fee to be able to access the video there. It turned out to be a bondage and S and M website that specialized in a certain kind of video like the one I was shown in. At the time I could not afford the membership fee. I could see a listing for the video that included a title with my full name and a single screenshot image of me bent over a bed with my ass exposed, but clicking to try to play it or to see more about it brought up a box for joining the website and paying the fee. I had to give up on trying to get to the video there even though the huge number of members that the site had could all see the video of me whenever they wanted to. 

When I related this fact to the one who posted the video there, they said it was a shame that I couldn't see the stats and comments on the video, since it was receiving even more views that they had hoped for and some of the comments included things that seemed impossible to be done with an asshole, but were talked about being done to my asshole. I was told that a huge amount of cum was being shot out while I was being watched in the video.

Considering what some viewers might want to do with my asshole was enough to make my asshole tighten up a little bit involuntarily, but luckily my asshole had completely recovered from its ordeal by then. 

I knew that the best thing I could do is to try not to think about the video, about how many places online where I might be ending up, who might be seeing it, and what some viewers of it wanted to do with my asshole after seeing the video. For a while I mostly succeeded in that, until the one who posted the video on that website sent me a screenshot of the video page that site members had access to. The comments section was not dropped down, so no comments were visible, but the view count had risen to above 92,000 views. 

I could not believe that the video had so many views on one single website that wasn't even a free website. I told myself that some people probably just watched the video a lot of times, but I knew that even if that was true a whole lot of people still must be watching the video. 

After that the video was discussed or mentioned less and less, until it seemed forgotten about at least to me. I found myself preferring for the video to just slip through the cracks and fade away. I knew that it would stay posted wherever it was posted, since the video had been included when all photos and videos of me naked had become a part of the public domain. This meant I could never seek or ask for its removal from anywhere that it had been posted by anyone. I just planned to not increase or further its display online, or to draw more attention to it.

That worked at least as well as I had hoped it would until a video of me naked began being offered for viewing each month on the Facebook page "David Steckel Exposed Exhibitionist", and then shared on my own personal Facebook page so that friends and followers would see it.

It wasn't long at all before I started being contacted through anonymous emails asking when the "ass punishment" video would be shown to everyone on Facebook. I still don't know if it was all one person doing the asking or if it was more than one person, since the sources of the messages are often different. I would reply that it would be soon, while I tried to figure a way to avoid having the video end up where so many people who know me would see it and where anyone else would be free to watch it. 

I knew that besides for the humiliation it would cause me, that there was no reason I could ever come up with for why the video wasn't shown to everyone. Since my humiliation is never a factor, and is often even more of a reason for a posting rather than less of a reason, I knew the video had to be seen by everyone at some point. No matter what, I was going to be seen tied naked while my asshole was "punished", and that it would include being seen by people who knew me. 

So when I was recently contacted again about when the video would be shown to everyone on Facebook, I said that it would be by the end of the year. Since it's December at this time, there is no more time for delay left for me. 

So the video is currently available through a post on the Facebook Exhibitionist page, and that post has been shared on my personal Facebook page. The video will be watched for sure by Facebook members that include people who know me and friends, and by now that has already started to happen. 

Since I can't fool myself into believing that no one will bother to watch the video, I'm left to just reminding myself that the video does belong to everyone and that it's everyone's right to see it. 

A screenshot from the video:

The same screenshot image but with the cigarette circled:

 This is how friends, people who know me, and how many others will see me and are already seeing me. But I do know that I have to be seen this way, because a public video that legally and legitimately belongs to everyone cannot be hidden.

Davidttthttteckelend

A hole in jeans update

 A couple months ago I related in a post about having a pair of blue jeans that had developed a small hole next to the zipper area. At the time a comment on the post suggested that I keep wearing them for as long as possible. Since "as long as possible" isn't very defining, it was decided that I would continue to wear them until a negative comment is made by someone about them to me personally while I am wearing them.

I currently have three pairs of jeans that I cycle through, wearing one after another. Each pair is worn, washed, and dried in a clothes dryer about once per week. Since the last post about them, the pair with the hole has been repeatedly worn just as I committed to doing. They have been washed and dried since then between eight and ten times. Here is what the hole currently looks like:

The hole continues to grow larger after each washing and drying, and my dick tends to pop out of the hole at times. Especially when I first stand up or while walking. It doesn't pop out every single time I get and erection, but if the hole is lined up in a certain way while an erection is growing, the tip of my dick will pop out of the hole. 

If no one is nearby, and I can push my dick back into my pants, only part of my shaft would show through the hole. But if I can't shove my dick back into my pants and my erection becomes full, it's very difficult to just shove it back inside without undoing my pants because of how much of my dick is extended beyond the hole. If I'm lucky, my erection will subside quickly and allow me to push my dick back into the hole. If I'm not lucky and others are around me, all I can do is to try to keep my shirt pulled down enough to cover my erection while it's extending through the hole.

The week before the photos were taken I was in a large drug store when one of my now common spontaneous erections began to occur. At first I didn't think much of it even though there were people throughout the store. Then I felt the tip of my dick begin exiting the hole. I was in an aisle where there were people in front of me and also behind me, and I didn't know what to do. I stopped walking and pretended to be looking at something on a lower shelf as I attempted to get my erection back inside of the hole while keeping my shirt pulled down as far as it would go. Since I was carrying items I had to set them down to free my hands. I could only use one hand since the other hand had to keep my shirt pulled down far enough. By then my erection had grown too much and too much of it extended out of the hole for me to get it to go back inside of the hole. I nearly succeeded but my pants were too tight for there to be enough slack in them, and my dick was too stiff. As others began walking in my direction I had to abandon my attempts and reign myself to just tying to keep my shirt pulled down. I had to pull down hard and stretch my shirt out, which was surely noticeable, but if I didn't my erection would be right out in the open.

I also had to keep the bottom of my shirt slightly away from my body, or the bulge and outline of my erection would easily show under my shirt. I couldn't carry the items I'd selected and keep my shirt pulled down at the same time, so I had to go and get a small basket the store keeps available and carry the basket with one hand while keeping my shirt pulled down. 

Fortunately for me, the checkout counter is high enough that by standing up against it, I was able to let go of my shirt without it rising up. As far as I know I managed to exit the store without anyone seeing my erection directly, even though one or more people may have noticed either the bulge under my shirt or the fact that I was making an effort to stretch the bottom of my shirt down as far as it would go.

I have dozens of t-shirts that I regularly wear, and of all of them only one will hang down far enough to cover the hole in my jeans or the fact that my dick is sticking out of it or at least visible through the hole. When that shirt is in the laundry, only shorter shirts are available. 

When I first put on the jeans with the hole, I am aware of the hole. But I very often forget that it's those jeans that I'm wearing when I go out anywhere. Unless something draws my attention to the hole, such as feeling my dick pop out through the hole, I often fail to think about the hole at all. On cool days I might feel the cool air hitting my dick and be reminded of the hole, but on warmer days as it's been lately where I live, I often go in and out of places and do whatever I'm out to do all without acknowledging the hole. Only later when I once again realize I have those jeans on, do I realize that I was walking around oblivious to the hole being there. I don't recall anyone obviously noticing the hole or seeing my dick through the hole, but if I'm not conscious of the hole at any moment, I'm not watching out for that sort of thing.

At times while wearing those jeans I will happen to look down and see my soft dick right inside of the hole, and if it won't be too noticeable to anyone I will quickly shit my dick to the right side, since the hole is on my left side. That only works for a short time or until I move around, since my dick naturally moves to the left side and will stay there. On it's own my dick will settle right where the hole is, which may have something to do with how the hole began to form in that spot to begin with. 

At the moment the hole is big enough to enable my dick to just pop through it at any time, but otherwise the jeans are still in decent enough shape for them to continue to be worn. More than once lately, when I need to pee and I'm about to unzip my pants while standing on front of a toilet, I will notice that my dick is already partially sticking out of the hole, and I will just pull it out through the hole a bit more and then pee without having to unzip the zipper at all. 

The next few cycles through the laundry are sure to enlarge the hole even more, and it's inevitable that others will notice it or possibly see my dick. If someone sees it and says something negative about it, then the jeans can be retired. If they see and don't say anything then nothing changes and the jeans will be worn again. 

If I could wear some sort of underwear, the jeans might be able to be worn indefinitely, but I long ago promised and committed not to ever wear underwear for any reason at all. It's also been so long since I've worn any that the feeling of them is intolerable to me. I only possess one single pair of underwear that were originally kept for unique times like doctors exams or such things, but underwear has not been worn even for those reasons for a long time. If I'm told at an exam to strip to my underwear, I just have to inform them that I don't wear any and have none on. So wearing underwear is not an option for me.

For now the jeans with the hole will continue to be worn regularly along with the other pairs that I own. It's inevitable that my dick will pop out from time to time, and I will deal with it as best as I can. For them not to be worn anymore, someone will not only end up seeing my dick, but they will also have to make a negative comment or react about it in a less than positive manner. Until that happens the hole will become larger and larger and will expose me even more than it already does.

 

All Exposure requirements and poll results continue to be fulfilled.

  

This post was created over a period of a week, with bits added at a time, so it's more like a stream of consciousness than an orderly, organized post. It's about the requirements that are in effect for me, both permanent ones and one that's still in the process of being decided.

Two requirements are mentioned often, mostly since they both have a major effect on daily life for me. Technically one has most of it's effect at night, while the other is nearly constant.

All requirements from previous and current polls continue to be fulfilled and obeyed. Of course the results of the now closed poll are forever permanent for me, and must be obeyed at all times regardless of what I might prefer or how inconvenient or humiliating they might be for me.

The currently ongoing poll  https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K deciding whether I am permitted to masturbate or intentionally ejaculate is free for anyone to anonymously vote in. All that's necessary is to vote for whatever is felt that I deserve. The current results prohibit me from masturbating or intentionally cumming. 

I would ask for votes for options that might eventually permit me to masturbate, but I have already been basically scolded by some contacts for attempting to sway voters and their votes. So all potential voters should vote for which option they want to or feel that I deserve. It is and will be mandatory and required for me to always follow and obey the result with the most votes.

All of the poll results do have some impact for me, but some have a more long term impact while others have a day to day impact.

One requirement that has a longer term impact is that every photo and video of me naked is essentially public domain, since anyone anywhere has the full right to possess, post, display, and share any photo or video of me naked that they desire, and for any reason or purpose they desire. Not only do I have no say about it, but even if I'm informed about any such thing beforehand, I cannot ask for it not to be done, and afterwards I am forbidden from asking or requesting the removal of any such post or display. This applies even if photos or video of me naked is to be shared with or sent to a person or people who know me personally.

Also, all photos and videos of me naked must be presented in manners that will enable not just anyone to see them, but in ways that will enable others who know me personally to see them. 

This has already led to some results. Currently, at least several people who do know me personally are known to have viewed at least some photos or videos of me naked, and more people who know me are certain to have viewed them without any way to know it for sure. Ironically, not one of them has chosen to mention to me about seeing me online naked, either in an attempt to avoid embarrassing me, or due to not wanting to reveal the fact that they looked at me naked. In any case though, some people known to me have seen me online naked and nothing can change that fact. It's just unknown to me what photos or videos they saw of me.

A requirement that could have an effect at any time is the requirement that my PC must remain available for access to anyone through the Teamviewer or Anydesk apps. Even if I'm aware of any access at any time, unless changes to the PC settings are being attempted, I cannot interfere with any access. This means that all folders and files are free for access or transferring for any use or reason. It also means that most websites I use or have an account on can be accessed or visited as me, even for the purpose of further exposing me in some manner to others, including to others who might know me personally.

Knowing it's all possible and that it must be permitted to occur is intimidating, but fortunately for me it rarely occurs. Even when it does occur, browsers other than the Firefox browser tend to be used, which have less direct access to most websites used by me. Still though, it's intimidating to know that my PC and many websites I use are essentially an open book to anyone who might want them to be.

Teamviewer address: 1 054 262 400 Password: Nakedandexposed1

Anydesk address: 990 573 524 Password: Showmystuff1

Even more intimidating is the requirement that if or when I am approached in person by anyone and told to or requested to strip off all of my clothing until naked, that I must comply. If this occurs in an open and public place, the most I can do is to hope to move to some nearby location with some amount of at least temporary privacy before complying. Once naked I am required to "gift" all clothing, or give them to the person who made the request, who is under no obligation to return any of the clothing to me. I would also have to submit to being photographed naked or recorded naked on video in any way desired by the new owner of whatever clothing I had just removed, The new owner of the clothing would then decide whether or not whether any clothing would be returned to me, whether any of it could be earned back by me in some way, or whether I would have to remain naked and be left entirely exposed for others to see.

The stripping naked on request part is intimidating by itself, but having to surrender all clothing and remain completely naked wherever I am at the time is much more intimidating. I cannot refuse or deny any request or demand that I strip naked, and once the request or demand is made all clothing I would be wearing and have to remove would immediately be owned by anyone who made the request. So essentially if I don't remove all of my clothes, or I don't surrender them, I am guilty of theft since no clothing at all at that location actually belongs to me anymore.

Although it's possible for this to occur at any time, I try not to think much about it and I will just have to deal with it as best as I can if or when it does occur, and accept however much humiliation and exposure that might result.

A requirement that does have a daily, or rather nightly effect for me is the requirement that I spend each and every night completely naked, including while in bed, without covering of any kind, with lights on, and with a window uncovered to enable anyone nearby to see and observe me at any time during the night.

Being in bed or sleeping now always means being exposed naked to anyone who happens to see me or who has the slightest desire to observe me naked. I rarely, if ever know if anyone is seeing me or who might be looking, but I cannot cover up or conceal anything at any time of night. Any form of covering up at any time, for any reason would mean violating the requirement. An insufficient light level, or not bright enough lights being on is also a violation. The same is true if the window doesn't remain uncovered at all times.

While asleep I not only remain unaware of any observation, but I cannot control any erections or anything I do. When I become aroused or horny while asleep, I not only get and erection that is visible for anyone to see, but I also often tend to hump the bed if lying on my front, and to thrust my hips upwards while lying on my back. Occasionally I wake up during these times, but without knowing how long I may have been doing it or who may already have observed it. I have to assume that there are times when I do these things without ever waking up at all, which could mean it's being observed without me knowing a single thing about even doing it. 

Since this became required for me, I'm only aware of being seen and observed by a few nearby others, but only because I was awake at the time and the observers made it fairly obvious that they were watching me. In those cases I still couldn't cover up or limit any observation of me. It's very likely those observers were only a fraction of how much I have been seen or observed since October of 2022 when the requirement went into effect.

A few others nearby do appear to look in through the window nearly each night to check or confirm that I am exposed to view naked. It's doubtful they are aware of the requirement, but it's not impossible that they are. I just know that unless I am exposed naked every night for the entire night, then there's a risk of being discovered of violating the requirement. 

The requirement also extends to anywhere else I spend any night. This includes motels, hotels, in a vehicle, or at any residence where I spend any night unless there is a clear and obvious reason why it cannot occur, such as no window being present. Who might see me, how much I might be seen, or how humiliating it might be for me are not valid reasons for violating the requirement.  

The final requirement is still the subject of an ongoing poll, but the current majority result is obliged to be followed as a requirement. The poll decides whether I can masturbate to relieve arousal and being horny or turned on, or whether I have to remain aroused without relief. 

https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K 

As of January 1st, 2023 the results have dictated that I cannot masturbate at all, and can only receive relief through a wet dream or some uncontrolled and unplanned ejaculation at some random time of day or night. Since then I have not masturbated or had the release of more than a drop or two of cum, since I dare not violate the requirement dictated by the anonymous voters in the poll. Their decisions and only their decisions can dictate whether or not I can masturbate, and their decisions were made with the expectation that they would be obeyed and followed. 

The requirement for not masturbating definitely has an influence on the requirement that I sleep naked while exposed through an uncovered window, since I am inevitably aroused and horny even while asleep. Erections and humping motions during sleep occur regularly rather than occasionally, and there is no hiding it concealing any of it from being viewed from outside. 

All requirements except for not masturbating are permanent, will never change, and can never be avoided by me, so they must be accepted. The poll for not masturbating will remain open until February 1st of 2024, and afterwards whatever decision has the most votes at the time will become a permanent requirement for me. 

Since most voters have so far decided that I cannot masturbate or cause an ejaculation, and that status has remained the same in spite of additional votes, I'm not only prohibited from masturbating, but I also have to face the possibility that eventually that prohibition may become permanent. 

Each day that passes while being prohibited from masturbating, the day the poll will end gets closer and closer, and unless the poll results change, the prohibition for masturbating will inevitably become permanent. There are still many months until then, but in the meantime I still cannot masturbate or intentionally do anything that will cause me to climax or cum. 

Sometimes I'm so aroused and horny that I feel like I definitely have to masturbate, and that I can't take it for another minute. So far I somehow take it though, even though I want to cum more than anything at those moments. 

I always have to remember that I am bound by and committed to obeying what a majority of others have decided in the poll, and how I would be disregarding and disrespecting their decisions and violating a requirement that I'm likely expected to obey. 

At times though, I do think about how those who decided that I cannot masturbate are free to masturbate as they please, while I never can. But I have to accept that the decisions made for me only apply to me, and those voters were only basing their decisions on what they honestly felt that I deserve. 

One thing is for sure though. I have already gone for longer by far without masturbating or cumming than I ever have before since hitting puberty. Each day that passes only extends that time. I can only wonder if or when I may have a wet dream or maybe even unintentionally climax and cum somewhere in public with others all around me. I'm afraid it will be so intense and feel so good that I'll react in a way that will reveal to everyone nearby exactly what is happening. There won't be much doubt about it if there ends up being a large wet spot on my pants, but that may be inevitable at some point as long as I cannot masturbate.

I do have to remind myself often that all of the requirements for me have been decided by voters as being what I deserve and are entirely separate from whatever I might want or prefer personally. I realize that getting what I deserve isn't assured to be easy, convenient, or even pleasurable. Being highly aroused and extremely horny for much of the time is definitely not easy, and it can preoccupy my thoughts often. It can also manifest itself in ways that I can barely avoid or not avoid at all.

One of those ways is at night while in bed and exposed naked to a wide outside area and to many potential others. Even though I feel extremely exposed at the time, because I am extremely exposed at the time, my arousal can now cause me to make humping or thrusting motions even while I'm still awake. I get so desperately aroused that I can't really help doing it in spite of the fact that anyone could be watching me at that very moment. Physically it feels so good and I'm so aroused that I can't make myself stop doing it even though I know I'm only adding to my exposure and providing an increased public display to anyone who might be seeing me through the window. 

I know it will be even more embarrassing for me when I inevitably end up seeing or encountering the same nearby others during the day who saw me exposed and displayed during the night. They can and are already seeing me completely naked and exposed in bed every night, and due to my inability to prevent my displays of arousal, they can now see those displays too. 

While I'm providing those displays, more than once I actually said out loud "Stop doing this", but it's as if my arousal and my desperately hard penis are in full control of me at the time, and I keep doing it. I will then usually say "Please... Let this stop... People can see this". But I can't stop and it continues. It only ends when my muscles get tired enough to need a rest, but by then I have provided quite a long display for anyone who might be looking or watching. After it occurred several times, part of me knows that others have likely already seen it happening, so unless or until I can relieve my arousal through masturbating, and since I can't make it stop, it's just easier not to resist it and to accept that I will keep being exposed to the neighborhood while doing it and keep being seen doing it.

There are many nights when being required to just be exposed naked all night is difficult enough by itself. There are some nearby others who I would not even want to be seen by without a shirt on, but they can now and will always be able to see each and every part of my naked body every night, and all of my displays of arousal. At times it's hard to accept the fact that I've permanently lost any rights or ability for privacy for any part of my body to a large part of the neighborhood. Having the option to choose or decide if or when to be exposed naked is much different than being required to be exposed every single night from beginning to end, being required to never cover up or to dim the lights, or for the window to be uncovered. There can be a helpless feeling to it, especially when I'm certainly being seen completely naked even while I am asleep. While asleep I never even know what position I'm in when I'm seen or how I'm displayed to any viewers. I can only wonder if it was my bare ass that was presented, or if my legs were spread offering a view between them. In the longer run it hardly matters much though, since anyone looking enough would eventually have a view of every place on my naked body. 

Not being permitted to masturbate or to have relief from being very aroused and horny simply guarantees that all potential viewers of my nightly exposure will also continuously see displays of my arousal that I'm nearly helpless to prevent. 

Obviously the intent of my requirement for being exposed each night is so that I am actually seen naked freely by anyone who is able to see me, and to make sure I have no choice about who sees me or how much of me they see. Before the poll with this requirement was closed, the results were so ridiculously one-sided in favor of the requirement that it was more than clear what others decided that I deserved. It was enough that I could only accept the fact that I must deserve it for so many others to have all decided the same thing. So however difficult it is at times, I will spend every night exposed naked because it's what I deserve.

It's looking more and more like the results of the poll for whether I am permitted to masturbate or intentionally cum may be going the same way. As much as I dread to have to admit it, far more voters have decided that I cannot masturbate over any of the other choices in the poll. 

I periodically try to promote the poll to see if additional votes may be in favor of me being allowed to masturbate once again, but for every vote for one of the other choices, there are four votes deciding that I cannot be allowed to masturbate or intentionally cum. April 1st of 2023 will mark the 90th day for me not being permitted to masturbate and the 90th day since I have masturbated or had an ejaculation. The poll https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K is due to remain open until February of 2024, but as one contact described it, the decision has likely already been made.

Obviously I would like to eventually receive permission in the poll to masturbate and cum once again, but I know the decisions made by voters must be respected and obeyed by me. Currently many more voters have decided that I deserve to not be permitted to masturbate or cause myself to cum. They decided that there can be no relief from arousal and being horny or turned on for me. I know each voter decides what they do for a reason, and they have every right to expect their decisions to be obeyed.  

It's not possible for me to assess what I deserve, and only others can decide that. I used to masturbate at least three times per day, and much more on some days. I can only wonder of I abused the ability to masturbate until I ejaculated, and if that abuse is now being paid for by me. 

If I do end up being permanently prohibited from masturbating, I will of course respect and obey that requirement and the voters who decided it. I will know that I almost certainly brought it upon myself, and that what voters decided was actually what I deserve regardless of how I might feel about it personally.

Please help to decide what I deserve concerning masturbating by voting in the poll.

https://poll-maker.com/QW60PXF8K 

**

I can't effectively provide any photographic proof that I am obeying the requirement to currently not masturbate or intentionally cum, but I can attest to the fact that I am obeying it to the letter, as difficult as it is. I obey it because from the start I was committed to obeying whatever was decided through a majority in the poll results. Also because the decisions made by voters must be respected and abided by, no matter what is decided. As mentioned already, it's about what I deserve and not about what I might want or prefer. 

Some proof can be shown that I am obeying the now permanent requirement that I am exposed naked through a window while in bed or asleep. Showing proof that one specific requirement is being obeyed still may not prove the requirement for not masturbating is also being obeyed, but it's just about the best that can be done.

Photos showing how I spend nights and the window I'm exposed through:

 

In the GIF below, someone nearby can be seen entering the passenger side of a vehicle before the vehicle begins to drive off.  It's not clear if I was seen or observed by them this time, although they have surely seen me at other times. I was not aware of their presence until seeing the images later. At night when it's dark outside, even if awake I can never know when anyone might be seeing me. Sometimes it's just easier not to know I'm being seen, at least until after it's already happened. Since I know I have to be seen naked anyway, it's just best to remain asleep while others are looking at my naked body being exposed. 

The most I can do is to swear, promise, and give my word that I will always obey all permanent requirements, and obey the majority decision in the ongoing poll until the final results are known in early 2024. The decision of voters must always be respected and obeyed.. When voters decide something, then it's sure to be something I deserve.

Seen VERY Exposed through window

 If it's not known already, I'm required to spend each night in bed completely naked, with bright lights on, without coverings of any kind, and with the window blind raised, which fully enables anyone nearby or passing through to see or observe me naked.

As mentioned in previous posts, for most of the night I am asleep or at least unable to see or know if or when I am being looked at. During the day though, quite a few who live nearby and those who come and go during the night, do tend to look towards or take long looks towards my window each time they are within sight of it. It's quite definite that they are looking in at me naked sometime during the nights or early morning.

It's not unexpected that I am being seen naked by nearby people, since the requirement to be and remain exposed every night for the entire night surely came with the intent that I actually be seen naked. It's always been inevitable that I would be and will be seen naked.

In the few months that I've been required to sleep naked and exposed it''s been clear that I was seen a few times. Knowing I am being seen and can be seen at any moment will occasionally leave me feeling anxious once I'm in bed and exposed.

Some recent advice I received mentioned that I might become less anxious about being seen naked in bed by being exposed naked through the window to a greater degree than I am while in bed. It made sense to me that might actually help to do that. 

I decided to do it not long after dawn on a morning when I also had access to a camera that could record it. Not only did I want to see how exposed I appeared, but it also seemed like it could be proof that I was obeying the requirement to be exposed while in bed. I didn't expect anything else to come from having a video of it.

So after a Saturday night of being exposed naked in bed until Sunday morning, I decided on that morning that I would try being exposed much more than I had been all night. It began within minutes of me waking up and before I was even fully awake yet.

The video of it is included and can be watched now or after further reading for more context. It took a while to get it compressed from it's original 1.5 Gigabyte size down to less than 100 Megabytes for posting/sharing purposes without losing much quality. Whenever it's viewed, watch closely on the left side of the view out of the window. The elapsed time during the video for when to watch for something is roughly at 2:42 and again at 13:35. It's not difficult to notice but it's best to watch it expanded on full screen mode. If full screen doesn't function then the video can be downloaded and full screen mode should function for the downloaded version.

Photos were clipped from the video that show three things. One shows me turned to show the camera what anyone outside would see.

The next ones show me being seen the first time at 2;40 into the video, followed by an enlargement of where the viewer stood while they looked at my exposed ass.

The last two show me being seen the second time at 13: 35 into the video, followed by another enlargement of where the viewer stood. This time I was looked at for much longer than the first time.

 

Once I turned on the camera, I climbed onto the bed, and did some difficult to make out commentary as I knelt on the bed, lowered my upper body, and raised my bare ass towards the uncovered window. With my raised ass presented to the neighborhood, I mostly just stayed in place without looking back too much or too often to see if I was being seen.

I thought it would be better not to know for sure at the time of I was being seen, so that I wouldn't have an urge to stop being exposed and presented naked in such a revealing way. At one point I did turn to show the camera the view of my ass that was being displayed towards the outside before I resumed my display.

In the video I acknowledge that I know I deserve this exposure, and even how I wouldn't know if I had been seen unless I saw it happen on the video later. I mention about how by then it would already have happened and nothing could be done about it. I mention a few things about which nearby people might be most likely to see me being displayed as I was.

Much later when I did finally watch the video, I was surprised to see in the background outside of the window, that someone appeared while walking. They then appear to notice me with my bare raised ass on display, and stop to look at me for a moment. They then move off towards the right and go out of sight. I was entirely oblivious at the time of the fact that I was being seen. Ironically at almost that very moment I was saying something about not knowing if I would be or was being seen. This viewing of me occurred even before I turned to show the camera a view of how I was being displayed through the window.

Since I had no idea that I had already been seen in such an exposed and humiliating position, I remained exposed for many more minutes.

After finding out that I had been seen after all, I watched more of the video. As it the ending came nearer, I was sure that nothing else of interest would happen. Just when I was considering stopping the video before the end, movement outside on the left side of the window became visible. 

A person walks into view, walks to where their view of me is in direct sight of them, and stops walking. They stand there looking at my exposed ass for much longer than I'd been looked at the first time. It can't be seen for sure if it's the same person twice or a different person seeing me the second time. There's no sign of the first person returning from right to left after seeing me the first time, but it's possible they did return without it being seen on the video.

Either way, whoever looked at me the second time made sure they got a good. long look at me. I tried to see if I could tell if they took any photos of me, but the resolution isn't high enough. The sun was still rising then too, and the brightness outside always becomes too much for the view outside to be seen on a camera. Even the eleven or so minutes between views of me, there was a big change in brightness. The second viewer can easily be seen, but is much more difficult to see who it might be. 

So I was either seen humiliatingly exposed by two people eleven minutes apart, or by one person who got a good look the first time, but a much better, longer look the second time.

Being seen so definitely and in such a revealing and humiliating position does make me consider hesitating to continue such exposures. But I know I need to become more accustomed to being seen naked in such ways by random others. I want to get to where it gets easier to just accept that I will be or am being seen naked during nights, and to accept or learn to dismiss any humiliation that results from it. 

I know there will be times when the area outside has lots of activity at night, and I hope to be able to accept that exposure. I also know that there will be nights spent in some hotel or motel where the requirement to sleep exposed naked still applies. In the rooms in those places I will still have to be completely naked in bed, the lights will still have to remain on all night, all but the fitted sheet over the mattress must be removed out of reach and sight, and any drapes, curtains, or blinds must be open far enough to enable my exposure and viewing. 

During nights in those places I will absolutely be seen or watched naked just due to the amount of other people there and because of they will be coming and going often. In those places, foot traffic will occur right outside and people will be free to stand directly on the other side of the window glass and just look at me. Somehow I have to be able to accept that without moving away, trying to cover up, or becoming too anxious about it.

I know I'm not there yet, since I'm still in near-disbelief that I was seen two times within a short time, and that the viewer actually stood still for as long as they did to get a good look at my exposed ass. There's no doubt that whoever looked at me is going to keep looking any time my window is in their view, so I do need to accept being seen by them often.

It should be said that I don't think they looked at my raised ass because they liked seeing it. I think they were too amazed at what they were seeing that they couldn't help but look. They may have also been curious about why I was on display naked like I was at the time. It's possible that they enjoyed what they saw, or possible that they thought it was erotic in some way, but I do doubt that. The reason why anyone looks at me naked doesn't have any influence on the requirement for me to be exposed naked every night. 

I suppose that the only way to know if a viewer does enjoy what they're viewing of me is if they return often for another view and spend more time taking a good look. Whether or not they do, I am and always will be required to be there exposed naked.  

At least now there is some video proof of me actually being seen naked other than online.

A hole in jeans

 In a post it was mentioned how one pair of jeans of mine has a hole near the zipper area. It was mentioned in a comment that I should keep wearing them for as long as possible.

I do have a few pairs of jeans, so the pair with the hole is cycled through. As they are washed or laundered, each pair is worn again. Each time the pair with the hole is worn or washed, the hole inevitably gets larger and more easily noticeable.

It began as the tiniest of holes, but has now become large enough to be potentially revealing.

As of today they are due to be laundered again, but before removing them for laundering, a few photos were taken. The hole will surely be slightly enlarged once the jeans go through the washer and the dryer.

So far only a small part of my penis is visible through the hole, especially when I have a full or partial erection. Since I still have no permission to masturbate, erections tend to occur often. Most shirts I own are not long enough to cover the hole unless the shirt is pulled down and held at all times, which is not possible. 

When I'm out and walking around it's hard to tell how much can be seen, since my point of view is from directly above, while the view of others is more straight on.

The few strings covering the hole are slowly being worn away with each wearing and each laundry cycle. 

When at home I'm naked most of the time, and I only put clothes on when I'm about to leave home, excluding any underwear of course. It's almost always just a shirt, pants, and shoes.

I have noticed a few others in public just glancing down towards the hole, but I can't be sure what may have been visible to them at the time. I often even forget that I'm currently wearing the jeans with the hole either until someone glances toward the hole or until I'm walking and feel a flow of cooler air on my penis. 

It's inevitable that the hole will become large enough to see through, at very least showing that I'm not wearing anything underneath. 

It's hard to say when "for as long as possible" will be, but clearly that point has not been reached yet.  

Of course this is what the jeans are concealing at least for now