A few days ago I received and email from an unrecognized email address. At first I assumed that it would be an email that had to be replied to, and that someone would soon be receiving the three signature images of me naked that are part of everything sent by me from that address.
But the email seemed to be some group or organization, which made me think that I might not be exposed again because of it.
When i curiously opened the email, all I saw was this:
I recently found and watched a video of you at:
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
The sender was listed as:
anonymous@sendity.org
Once I realized it was an email sent anonymously, I knew I wouldn't need to reply to it, since I couldn't. But I saw the link in the message and knew right away that it just had to go to a video of me naked. I clicked the link to see which video it might be.
The moment the page loaded I saw that the video was the one of me that's currently being featured on Facebook, where a lit cigarette is in my asshole and I'm tied and have to wait for it to burn down and punish my asshole.
At first this made me anxious, since it was proof that someone had watched that video, and had sent the link to it to me. But I quickly realized that the video was there for anyone to watch and that it was only one more person who had now seen it. So I didn't think too much more about it afterwards.
But the very next day I saw that another email had been received from the same place. This one went even further by including the link to the same video, but also including a working link to the Dropbox full of photos and videos of me naked.
I recently mentioned finding and watching a video of you at: https://clipchamp.com/watch/
This email was sent anonymously using Sendity.
Please do not reply to this email, Your reply I will go nowhere
My attention was on the links in the message and not so much on the text of it, and I wondered what the point was for sending me links to my own exposure.
But then I noticed that some of the text mentioned the email being accessible to others and how it would be. I felt some anxiety rising as I wondered what that meant. I didn't see any other recipients listed. I wondered if separate emails might have been sent to other people.
When I tried visiting the site where the emails came from all I saw was a page for sending an email anonymously. I pondered it all for a while, but then I decided it wasn't worth trying to figure out since there was nothing I could do about it anyway.
For two more days everything seemed to be over with, with no more emails like that coming.
But then another email appeared in my inbox from the same location. This one was both more stunning and more confusing, since it contained my name, me email address in the actual message, a list of links to videos of me naked, and it even mentioned how three photos of me naked have to be in every email I send or reply to. I knew whoever it was had to be someone pretty familiar with me and with my online exposure naked.
To: DaveS113065@gmail.com (David Steckel) Your online presence seems to be endless. So much that more of you keeps showing up. Just in the last day, these were came across.
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
https://clipchamp.com/watch/
And then there's this: "Without exception, all emails and replies sent from Daves113065@gmail.com must include the three signature images of David Steckel." Three very revealing images of you of course. There must be times when you dread that obligation. When you don't know who will be seeing you or when you really don't want someone to see you. But rules are rules which can't be changed due to feelings.
This email was sent anonymously using Sendity.
Please do not reply to this email, Your reply I will go nowhere
That was the stunning part. The confusing part is that it seemed like a lot of trouble to send all of that to me, since I would be the only one who could see it.
I was perplexed enough to go back to the website and to look at it a little better.
I still couldn't find anything that explained much. Then I noticed a few lines in a small box on the top right side of the page. When I clicked on it, a drop-down menu opened. As I read the options in it, my eyes focused on a line that said "Anonymous Wall".
Assuming it was something that was only accessible to some sort of paid membership, I clicked on it without expecting to be able to access it.
But a long page opened up with all kinds of random email messages that appeared to be sent to people anonymously. They were arranged by date and got older as the page was scrolled down. I clicked on one message and it opened up to show the whole message. It seemed like gibberish, so I closed it which returned me to the list page.
It began to occur to me that the emails sent to me might also be on the page somewhere, and as I started to scroll down to see if that was true, I know that I said out loud "No. It couldn't be. It can't be..."
But it was. Only a short scroll down and there was the last message to me. A further scroll down showed the other messages to me.
Now I knew what was meant by "accessible to others". The emails came from someone who was anonymous, but what they contained was available to anyone who scrolled down that page. With videos of me, a Dropbox, and my full name and email address all being so available, and where it's anyone's guess at how many other people might see it all, I assumed there must be a way to hide or remove those messages.
But there appears not to be any method or means for removing anything. As I sat back and realized there was not a single thing I could do about it, I couldn't ignore the fact that by the time I found that page, that some people had probably already seen the emails to me.
Then I thought "Maybe they won't last long there. Maybe the moderation for the site will remove them".
But not so far. Their policy seems to be that only threats of violence get removed. The site appears to be content just to leave the messages in place where users or visitors to the site are able to see them. I can only assume the sender of the emails knew that or wanted that.
I am curious about who sent and posted the messages, but then I think about how I probably don't have a right to know that.
But since the emails can be seen by anyone on that site, there's no point in it being withheld from anyone else.
The list page or wall page can be found at:
The three emails I received can be found at: (in the order they were received)
https://sendity.org/a-video-of-you/
https://sendity.org/re-a-video-of-you/
https://sendity.org/more-of-you/
For me there's not much to do except to wait and be seen with everyone being able to know my name and my email address.
Some of the other emails I saw on the wall page seem to be from some not so nice or not so pleasant or polite people, so I don't know what I might expect once they click any of the links and end up seeing me naked. I'm a little, but not too concerned about that though. All I really expect to happen now is that more people will be seeing me naked, and will see me in some videos.
What I think about most is how, even if it was necessary, there really is nothing I can do about it, since rules for things like voyeurism and privacy rights do not apply to me. The sender must be aware of having the right to expose me as they wish.
I suppose they do deserve some credit for their resourcefulness.
They found and used a website that I'd never heard of before.
They sent messages that I thought only I could see, but all along were visible to other people.
They knew where to find things that showed me naked, and they basically made sure other people would see those things.
They had to know that once the messages were sent to me, they would end up on a page where anyone could see them, and where I would have to leave them even if I found the page.
So for now I'm just waiting as people using the site see me, and waiting to see if anything more than that results from it that would be known to me.
I already realize that I will never know how many people will have seen me naked because of it all. There's always the contrast of how the ability to see me naked is so public, and how everyone who sees me naked can always see me anonymously and privately.
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