To show that my required nightly exposure while in bed is occurring and ongoing, some recent photos are now available. Due to the current results of decisions in the open questionnaire at: https://forms.gle/cx6YQK5zF6fuNk3n8 there has been no masturbation by me for 15 days.
This has made erections more common, unpredictable, and caused them to last much longer than they otherwise would. Erections occur while awake and also during sleep at a time while my exposure is occurring each night in bed through a window.
With the night time temperatures being quite low recently, the window has had to remain closed but still largely uncovered as the photos show. The blind is fixed in place and cannot be closed without the removal of plastic ties that hold it in place.
The light level in the room is the same each night and no sheets or any other covering is present or within reach.
A series of timed photos show me in bed naked and show the uncovered window beyond. At night the light in the room causes a reflection in the glass, which from my position on the bed mostly appears as my own naked reflection. The photos don't appear to show this reflection of me, but it causes me to be able to see little or nothing of the outside at night, or to know whether anyone might be seeing me or not.
In order to sleep I can only lie there exposed whether I'm being seen at the moment or not. There have only been a few times while I was awake when it was clear that others were looking in at me and seeing me. While asleep it's unknown if or when I am being seen or observed in bed.
The photos might appear much the same, but they can also be seen in gif image that shows the small differences in them.
Have you had any other close calls like you described within your first couple of days?
ReplyDeleteThere have been a few close calls in the last couple of days, but I seem to be getting better at knowing what's getting close to happening.
DeleteWhen I could still masturbate regularly, I was used to how much stimulation my penis could usually take and about how long it might be before I got near to climaxing.
Now it takes a lot less stimulation and less time before I'm close to climaxing. I'm still not adjusted to that, but I think I'm a little bit better at realizing that my point of no return is very near.
Being more aroused a lot of the time than I'm used to is almost definitely the reason why I absentmindedly keep finding myself rubbing my pants right on top of my penis, which is either erect or gets that way quickly.
I do it most often when watching television or when sitting in a car doing nothing. At times I feel a climax approaching at almost the same time I realize what I'm doing.
Even though it's really difficult to stop doing it because of how good it feels, I stop because I know I have to.
As days continue to go by with no masturbating, this unconscious habit has become more frequent. I'm also finding myself doing it when others are around, such as waiting in line in a store or anywhere that involves waiting.
I usually become aware of doing it pretty quickly, but by then I've rubbed at least a few times. Even when I try to avoid doing it, my attention and my mind will wander enough that I can start all over again.
The few times so far that someone near me noticed me doing it, I tried to make it look like readjusting or scratching an itch. I don't know if I was very convincing though.
I have no idea about whether this can ever be adjusted to or gotten used to, since I haven't experienced having such a heightened state of arousal and lack of masturbating as I am now.
If there isn't any getting used to it then there's going to be an ongoing risk for me having an unintended ejaculation, possibly even in public or at some other inconvenient time or place.
Now that links to the blog are in more places where they should be and should have already been, has the number of visits gone up at all? Have any of your friends said anything about see it?
ReplyDeleteI just know that the view count for the blog had gone up drastically over the last few days. It's well over 120 views per day, which it barely reached in a week before now. It's entirely unknown who the additional viewers might be. For the sake of their privacy as to whether any friends have seen the blog all I can say is yes some have..
DeleteI still see your Dropbox listed under about me but not the other site with the more updated photos/videos.
ReplyDeleteThe summary for the blog has been edited to include a link to the updated album. I'm sorry about the delay and for not realizing what was being pointed out.
DeleteThe light in the room in the pictures looks much better than it looked in the picture posted before. That's how it should always be and never any dimmer. It has to be easy for people looking in to see that you're naked.
ReplyDeleteThe more recent photos show the actual light level in the room. The first photo from a few days before was taken with a filter on it that made the photo appear darker than it really was.
DeleteI realize the light in the room can't be too low.
With so much about the requirement for me to sleep exposed being so available to others, I know anything that was insufficient would be noticed and pointed out to me as something that had to be corrected.
Has it surprised you about how much is being found where you're not exposed enough or not exposed to some of the right people? Is what has been found so far and what still might be found and have to be corrected ever unnerving for you?
ReplyDeleteIt is kind of surprising what's been found so far that I didn't have any idea about. So far everything mentioned has turned out to be true, accurate, and beyond question or dispute.
ReplyDeleteI don't think anything found so far has actually unnerved me, even if it did make me a bit anxious once or twice. It's hard to say how anything that might be found later might make me feel, since it can depend on how much more exposure it might result in for me, what that exposure is, and who is likely or sure to see it once whatever was pointed out is corrected.
I know that these photos were taken on a borrowed camera. But even if the quality isn't as good can you still get more current pictures videos like this? Perhaps that will be more feasible whenever you get a replacement cell phone. I wouldn't mind seeing pictures of you doing the day (i.e. aroused in public). I remember one day you mentioned how you had to stop what you were doing because you almost ejaculated. Have you had any calls that were that close (I think it was when you were moving a box). Do you wear jeans when you work or something different. If you did end up climaxing in public it would be great to have a selfie of the occasion if at all possible. Does thrusting your hips upward provide any relief? I hope people will vote to let you wear something minimal to bed that may draw more attention to you and cause you to potentially be more aroused.
ReplyDeleteThere are close calls where I get very close to ejaculating every day now and often several times a day. I'm realizing though, that I don't have the luxury of having my penis stimulated very much before a near-climax approaches. Enjoying some amount of stimulation is less possible without risking an ejaculation. More often now, I end up resigning myself to having to stop any stimulation sooner and being resigned to remain in my frustratingly arousing condition.
DeleteThrusting my hips never really did provide any real relief, and was mostly a poor substitute for stimulation. It does feel good to do it though.
More and more, thrusting my hips has become a reaction to my frustrating arousal once a risk of ejaculating causes any other sort of stimulation to stop. At that point I know it's about all I can do. The close calls mostly tend to be very similar to one another and describing them can feel and sound repetitive. Describing one feels a lot like describing most or all of them.
At work I wear a type of carpenter jeans. A bit looser fitting with extra pockets and similar in color to blue jeans.The looser fit and without underwear seems to lessen the contact and stimulation of my penis rather than increase it.
The more tight regular fitting jeans that I wear when not working seem to induce increased stimulation, probably since nearly all movement causes some amount of contact and rubbing across my penis.
I don't know about others but I like reading about them even if it sounds repetitive.
DeleteDo you have any more stories about what's happened during the day or night the past couple days?
ReplyDeleteNow your new sleeping arrangement has been in place for a while, how does it feel? Do you feel anticipation or dread as bed-time approaches? Ever find yourself staying up later to put off the inevitable exposure?
ReplyDeleteThe answer to that has varied over time and can also vary from night to night. I've currently been exposed for more then sixty consecutive nights.
ReplyDeleteThe first nights were the most anxiety filled. I felt very looked at and watched even without any sign of it happening at any particular moment. I would get a bit anxious as the time for going to be approached and even more so upon getting into bed.
Actually it's more accurate now to say that I get onto the bed, rather than into it. The bed began to, and still does feel a lot like a stage where there may or may not be an audience at any given time.
Only on a few nights I did delay going to bed just to delay my exposure a bit longer, but never for too long, since going to bed was unavoidable.
During the six to eight hours per night that I'm asleep, I'm entirely exposed even though I might not feel it or realize it until i wake up again. By now that's well over 400 hours of being exposed without any knowledge of whether or not I've been seen, who may have seen me, or even how long they may have looked.
More recently as it's become more habitual and routine for me to be exposed all night, I think less about it beforehand. As I get onto the bed each night though, I know I'm once again exposed and will be for the entire night.
I don't know it for sure, but it feels as if most of those who might see me already have, and they more than likely just have a quick look at me to make sure I'm there and exposed as usual, and to see whatever they might see. Those who can see me from their own windows can look at their leisure and may even expect to see me each night.
On some nights I can still feel very exposed upon getting onto the bed, especially if I catch sight of myself being reflected naked in the glass of the window, since it's a reminder of what anyone looking can see.
More often than not I just remind myself that if I want to sleep I have to be exposed.
There are some nights when I would prefer some privacy but I know that's not an option. I get onto the bed more or less resigned to another night of exposure. I just accept that it's the way it is now.
I know I'm exposed whether I'm awake or asleep, so I tend to welcome sleep when it comes and I can often fall asleep within a short time.
When I wake up in the morning I only know I've been exposed all night, and I can only wonder whether I was seen during the night.
It feels likely that there are only occasional first time viewers by now.